Little Steps #7

 The whole admission and preoperative assessment was uneventful. I got a room shared with a middle aged patient who was scheduled for a laparotomy TAHBSO on the same day as me. 

I think the thing that I dreaded most was the spinal anesthesia administration. Me and pain did not go well hand in hand. Thousands of thoughts were spiraling in my mind. 

But alhamdulillah, I did not even have the time to worry about that on the table. I was sedated nicely before they proceed for spinal. Only once or twice I was awaken during the procedure, and since I could not feel only Allah knows what they were doing down there, I drifted back into slumber.

A little more alert when they have finished closing my abdomen and Dr I showed me the sample in the fluid filled jar. It was quite huge, I was surprised of the size. It was different seeing it in the ultrasound and looking at the gross specimen.

Photo by Jackie Hutchinson on Unsplash

I could not feel or move my lower limbs during the observation. Wriggled my toes a little bit. No pain at the operation site so far.

They pushed me back to the ward. I vomited clear fluid on the way- I apologized to the attendant and nurse. Me and two other post op patients were placed in another room for closer observation.

And I started to regain the sensory and motor function of my lower body. Pain and discomfort crept in. Dull aching pain at the lower back - anesthesia aftermath. I coughed twice and the anguish made me ask for analgesia. 

Could not sleep well during the night. Afraid to turn. Afraid to move. Unpleasant sensation during the effort. Paranoid that the CBD was going to dislodged if I moved too much. The thought of asking warm/cold pack to ease the backache did not cross my mind.

The next morning, I was cleaned by the staff. They removed the CBD, changed the cloth and propped me up. Prepared a cup of hot chocolate which I sipped slowly, grateful for the warm liquid. Fell asleep while waiting for Dr I. They informed me that she would be a little bit late. 

Trying to go to the bathroom for the first time was terrifying. I heavily depended on the assisting nurse. I leaned on her while cruising slowly. She even helped me washed myself, may Allah bless her soul. She assured me that the pain was the worst only on the first time. The next attempts would not be as painful. And she was right. 

Since I was able to ambulate, they let me back to my room -  although it was a different room than before.